Finding Family

So, a crazy story. My mom was adopted and grew up in Wyoming. Ten years ago a woman reached out to tell her she was one of her biological sisters. My mom always knew that she was adopted, but was told that she had biological siblings and that at the time of her adoption, her biological mother was married—but not to my mother’s biological father.  We later found out that when my mother was born her biological mother brought her home from the hospital for only a few days before her mother decided that she couldn’t keep the baby because she was obviously the product of an extramarital affair.  To avoid the stigma that would occur in the small town where the family lived, my biological grandmother put my mom up for adoption. Five years ago we met my biological grandmother, aunts and uncles (and lots of cousins!) for the first time. This past weekend I flew to see them again. Although I’ve only visited once before I was welcomed right in as if I’ve been part of the family forever. 

It’s been interesting to see the similarities of my family to this long lost other family (a real life nature vs nurture in action). It also got me thinking on the importance of family and other people in our lives. Growing up, obviously family is key for survival and basic needs but as you get older it changes. Family is a support system and also gives you a sense of belonging. Some of us are blessed to have happy, healthy families. For others, family may be a sore spot, something that was/is lacking in some ways. 

The thing is, family doesn’t have to be the one you were born into. There are different kinds of families. We need people. As humans, we are social creatures, connection brings joy and value into our lives. We learn and grow from others experiences and advice, and from the support and cooperation our peers provide. You can choose to create your tribe and build a group of people who can help support your to your dream. Find your family…or maybe they’ll even find you.