How Body Language Can Change YOU
Last week I wrote about how the words you use can make a big impact on your mindset. This week we’re diving into the way people communicate with body language. The way we hold and present ourselves can change our attitude and other peoples perception of us.
Your body posture and what you're doing with your expression and eyes are always a subconscious signal showing how you're thinking and feeling. Some common examples are:
Avoiding eye contact indicates shyness or un-comfort.
Arms crossed comes off as defensive.
Smiles are usually inviting (but it also depends on whether it’s a genuine or fake smile).
Tapping fingers or toes usually indicates impatience.
People tend to point their feet in the direction they want to go, meaning in a conversation where one’s feet are pointed away can show the urge to leave.
Someone leaning away shows disinterest while leaning in shows engagement.
Clasped hands indicate stress.
Having one’s hands in pockets can mean nervousness or hiding something.
Hunched shoulders are commonly associated with depression or stress.
The list goes on. Reading others body language and mirroring (“social phenomenon where people mimic another person's posture, gestures, and words. It's often an unconscious behavior but it's a sign that people are attuned and in sync to one another”) can make all the difference in how others perceive us. For some people this comes naturally, others have to work much harder, but the more you can recognize and practice it the better you can get at both presenting yourself and understanding other people.
Now obviously our body language speaks to other people in many different ways, but how can it impact us? The fascinating thing is that studies are starting to show that you can actually change your mental state by changing your body position. According to Amy Cuddy, a Social Psychologist, “standing in a posture of confidence, even when we don't feel confident -- can boost feelings of confidence, and might have an impact on our chances for success.” (If you're interested in learning more, watch her awesome TedTalk here).
“It’s not fake it till you make it, it’s fake it till you become it.” -Amy Cuddy
Just like how the words we choose affect our reality, so too can our physical body. Try it! Next time you’re feeling upset or nervous and you feel your body curling in on itself, stand tall and proud, strike a power pose, put your hands on your hips and present yourself as the superwoman/man you are. I’m sure you’ll feel your confidence rise…or at least just laugh at yourself for how ridiculous you feel. Either way, we know that body language matters in tough times like these. So get up, get moving, and keep your chin up!